Question # 533: My two young kids of marriageable age are unwilling to get married before sustaining themselves. Please advise using Quranic verses and authentic hadith.
bismi-llahi r-raḥmani r-raḥīm,
Assalamu ‘laikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh,
All praise and thanks are due to Allah (سبحانه و تعالى), and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger (صلى الله عليه و سلم).
First of all, we implore Allah (سبحانه و تعالى) to help us serve His cause and render our work for His sake.
Shorter Answer: Islam encourages early Marriage. Even though many young people fear getting married before sustaining themselves, it is mentioned in the Qur’an that Marriage increases rizq (sustenance) and that one should not delay getting married because of this. Further, there are several ahadith emphasizing the importance of Marriage; in summary, the following sunnah and benefits can be derived from them:
- Marriage is an act of worship and a highly recommended part of the sunnah of the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم).
- Hastening to get married and satisfying one’s desires through lawful means is among the obedience to Allah.
- Seeking Allah’s Help to get a religious and pleasing spouse could help one remain chaste and pious.
- Whoever marries has achieved one-half of one’s religion.
- A righteous spouse is among the best provisions of this world.
Long Answer: Islam encourages early Marriage. Even though a lot of young people fear getting married before sustaining themselves, it is mentioned in the Qur’an how Marriage increases rizq (sustenance) and that one should not delay getting married because of this reason. “And marry the unmarried among you and the righteous among your male slaves and female slaves. If they should be poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty, and Allah is all-Encompassing and Knowing.” (Soorah an-Noor, 24:32). Al-Baghawi, in his commentary, stated: enrich here means sufficiency. (Tafsir al-Baghawi)
The following are some other ahadith worth pondering in this regard:
- Imam Al-Bukhari and Muslim narrated from Ibn Mas’oud (رضي الله عنه) that the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said: “O, young people whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e., his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse, etc.) …” Therefore, hastening to get married and satisfying one’s desires through lawful means [is among the obedience to Allah. Being] steadfast on the way of Allah’s obedience and seeking Allah’s Help to get a religious and pleasing [spouse] …could help you be chaste and pious.
- At-Tirmidhi narrated, in a report which he classed as hasan, from Abu Hurayrah (رضي الله عنه), who said: The Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said: “There are three whom Allah is bound to help: the mujaahid who strives (in jihad) for the sake of Allah, the mukaatib (a slave who has made a contract of manumission with his master) who wants to pay off his manumission, and a man who gets married, seeking to remain chaste.” (It was classed as hasan by al-Albani in Saheeh at-Tirmidhi)
- It was narrated from Aishah (رضي الله عنها) that the Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said: “Marriage is part of my sunnah, and whoever does not follow my sunnah has nothing to do with me. Get married, for I will boast of your great numbers before the nations. Whoever has the means, let him get married, and whoever does not, then he should fast, for it will diminish his desire.” (Sunan Ibn Majah; graded hasan)
- Anas ibn Malik (رضي الله عنه) reported: The Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said, “Whoever Allah provides with a righteous wife, Allah has assisted him in half of his religion. Let him fear Allah regarding the second half.” (al-Mu’jam al-Awsaṭ, graded sahih according to Al-Suyuti; also narrated by al-Haakim in al-Mustadrak, al-Tabarani in al-Awsat and al-Bayhaqi in Shu’ab al-Eemaan. Al-Haakim said: This is a hadith with a sahih isnad, although they (al-Bukhari and Muslim) did not narrate it. Al-Dhahabi said in al-Talkhees: it is sahih. It was classed as hasan by al-Albani in Saheeh al-Targheeb)
- It was narrated from Abdullah bin Amr (رضي الله عنه) that the Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said: “This world is but provisions, and there is no provision in this world better than a righteous wife.” (Sunan Ibn Majah; graded sahih)
- Anas Ibn Malik reports that a group of three men came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) asking how the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) worshipped Allah, and when they were informed about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said, “Where are we from the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) as his past and future sins have been forgiven.” Then one of them said, “I will perform Prayer throughout the night forever.” The other said, ‘I will fast throughout the year.” The third said, “I will keep away from women and will not marry forever.” Allah’s Messenger (صلى الله عليه و سلم) came to them and said, “Are you the same people who said so and so? By Allah, I fear Allah, and I am conscious of Him better than you; yet I fast and break my fast, I perform Prayer and sleep, and I (also) marry women. So, he who does not follow my Sunnah (tradition) is not from me (i.e., not one of my followers).” (Narrated by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
(The above reply is based on the following resources:
- Islamweb.net, a website belonging to the Ministry of Awqaf and Islamic Affairs in the State of Qatar; and
Allahu A’lam (Allah (سبحانه و تعالى) knows best) and all Perfections belong to Allah, and all mistakes belong to me alone. May Allah (سبحانه و تعالى) forgive me, Ameen.